Guess what? Rough Draft #2 of The Hungry Hungry Games (authored by: yours truly!) is nearly done! I'm trying super hard to finish it by June 1st, the deadline for our CreateSpace novels. Quick lowdown for those who have no idea what I'm talking about: I participated in NaNoWriMo's Young Writer's Program this year, and if you finished your goal (mine was 30,000 words) before November 30th, you win 5 free copies of your novel from CreateSpace, a self-publishing website. Anyways (Oh, whatever, I'll say it anyway[s]!), The Hungry Hungry Games is not my ORIGINAL novel but still one deserving of it's own copy.
Here's a little sampling of me and my best friend, for whom I wrote it, trying to describe it to our book club. BEWARE: It makes no sense whatsoever.
Me: It's this novel about some tyrannical gamemakers named Milton and Bradley who give special drugs to 24 lucky humans, turning them into hippo mutants. Then the mutants are placed in an arena for a FIGHT to the DEATH!
Friend: What were the two main characters named?
Me: Hale and Leigh.
Friend: There's also some pineapple quicksand...
Me: Don't forget the demon wolves!
Friend: Oh, yeah! Or the rock!
Me: Ah yes, the rock. Or the murderer.
Friend: Named Buck!
Me: The two main hippos were named Nyssa and Pete. Nyssa's a jerk. I don't like her.
Friend: You're just mean. She wasn't the villain-- Claudia was.
Me: Oh yeah, she tied up the tour guide named Ashley in a tree!
Friend: Didn't she tie up the old man with the banana hat too?
Me: Ben Ben the Lizard Man!
Friend: Ah, that magical rock! Wait, when did Pete give it to them again?
Me: In the mud pits, remember when the bugs were singing "It's A Small World After All"?
Friend: Oh, yes.
Me: When Hale and Leigh got their jumpsuits.
Friend: And Hale's said "I'm a Beliber" on it!"
Ah, yes... well, this is paraphrased just a tad (she'd kill me for saying anything different), but you get the gist of my short story now, right?
Ahem. Maybe not.
Look for "The Hungry Hungry Games" on bookshelves near you soon!
I wish... Suzanne Collin's agent would probably kill me...
Got to go... Scholastic Press is trying to knock down the door.
Showing posts with label Pineapples. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pineapples. Show all posts
Monday, May 21, 2012
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
The Pineapple and the Hare
Good day, fine folks!!
Today I am here to share with you a bizarre NY state exam story with some even bizarre-er questions!
Without further ado, here is the story:
"In the olden times, animals could speak English, just like you and me. There was a lovely enchanted forest that flourished with a bunch of these magical animals. One day, a hare was relaxing by a tree. All of a sudden, he noticed a pineapple sitting near him.
The hare, being magical and all, told the pineapple, "Um, hi."
The pineapple could speak English too.
"I challenge you to a race! Whoever makes it across the forest and back first wins a ninja! And a lifetime's supply of toothpaste!"
The hare looked at the pineapple strangely, but agreed to the race.
The next day, the competition was coming into play. All the animals in the forest (but not the pineapples, for pineapples are immobile) arranged a finish/start line in between two trees. The coyote placed the pineapple in front of the starting line, and the hare was on his way.
Everyone on the sidelines was bustling about and chatting about the obvious prediction that the hare was going to claim the victory (and the ninja and the toothpaste). Suddenly, the crow had a revolutionary realization.
"AAAAIEEH! Friends! I have an idea to share! The pineapple has not challenged our good companion, the hare, to just a simple race! Surely the pineapple must know that he CANNOT MOVE! He obviously has a trick up his sleeve!" exclaimed the crow.
The moose spoke up.
"Pineapples don't have sleeves."
"You fool! You know what I mean! I think that the pineapple knows we're cheering for the hare, so he is planning to pull a trick on us, so we look foolish when he wins! Let's sink the pineapple's intentions, and let's cheer for the stupid fruit!" the crow passionately proclaimed. The other animals cheered, and started chanting, "FOIL THE PLAN! FOIL THE PLAN! FOIL THE PLAN!"
A few minutes later, the hare arrived. He got into place next to the pineapple, who sat there contently. The monkey blew the tree-bark whistle, and the race began! The hare took off, sprinting through the forest, and the pineapple ...
It sat there.
The animals glanced at each other blankly, and then started to realize how dumb they were. The pineapple did not have a trick up its sleeve. It wanted an honest race — but it knew it couldn't walk (let alone run)!
About a few hours later, the hare came into sight again. It flew right across the finish line, still as fast as it was when it first took off. The hare had won, but the pineapple still sat at his starting point, and had not even budged."
This is WORD FOR WORD, I swear! Don't believe me, you can read the actual article here!
Here are the two questions that pertain to the passage:
1. Why did the animals eat the pineapple?
a. they were annoyed
b. they were amused
c. they were hungry
d. they wanted to
2. Who was the wisest?
a. the hare
b. moose
c. crow
d. owl
The only thing that I can glean is that there was no owl. And that the moose must be the wisest, for as he very wisely proclaimed, "Pineapples don't have sleeves."
I love it when the hare replies to the pineapple's sudden appearance with a very literate... "Um, hi."
(I thought we weren't supposed to say 'um'... at least, that's what's been ingrained into me. I use it anyway, but I mean, it's a public school. Wouldn't you think that they wouldn't want to undermine any die-hard English teachers? "Um, hi." Gimme a break.)
Makes me glad to be homeschooled... I would not want to tackle this particular test!!
Today I am here to share with you a bizarre NY state exam story with some even bizarre-er questions!
Without further ado, here is the story:
"In the olden times, animals could speak English, just like you and me. There was a lovely enchanted forest that flourished with a bunch of these magical animals. One day, a hare was relaxing by a tree. All of a sudden, he noticed a pineapple sitting near him.
The hare, being magical and all, told the pineapple, "Um, hi."
The pineapple could speak English too.
"I challenge you to a race! Whoever makes it across the forest and back first wins a ninja! And a lifetime's supply of toothpaste!"
The hare looked at the pineapple strangely, but agreed to the race.
The next day, the competition was coming into play. All the animals in the forest (but not the pineapples, for pineapples are immobile) arranged a finish/start line in between two trees. The coyote placed the pineapple in front of the starting line, and the hare was on his way.
Everyone on the sidelines was bustling about and chatting about the obvious prediction that the hare was going to claim the victory (and the ninja and the toothpaste). Suddenly, the crow had a revolutionary realization.
"AAAAIEEH! Friends! I have an idea to share! The pineapple has not challenged our good companion, the hare, to just a simple race! Surely the pineapple must know that he CANNOT MOVE! He obviously has a trick up his sleeve!" exclaimed the crow.
The moose spoke up.
"Pineapples don't have sleeves."
"You fool! You know what I mean! I think that the pineapple knows we're cheering for the hare, so he is planning to pull a trick on us, so we look foolish when he wins! Let's sink the pineapple's intentions, and let's cheer for the stupid fruit!" the crow passionately proclaimed. The other animals cheered, and started chanting, "FOIL THE PLAN! FOIL THE PLAN! FOIL THE PLAN!"
A few minutes later, the hare arrived. He got into place next to the pineapple, who sat there contently. The monkey blew the tree-bark whistle, and the race began! The hare took off, sprinting through the forest, and the pineapple ...
It sat there.
The animals glanced at each other blankly, and then started to realize how dumb they were. The pineapple did not have a trick up its sleeve. It wanted an honest race — but it knew it couldn't walk (let alone run)!
About a few hours later, the hare came into sight again. It flew right across the finish line, still as fast as it was when it first took off. The hare had won, but the pineapple still sat at his starting point, and had not even budged."
This is WORD FOR WORD, I swear! Don't believe me, you can read the actual article here!
Here are the two questions that pertain to the passage:
1. Why did the animals eat the pineapple?
a. they were annoyed
b. they were amused
c. they were hungry
d. they wanted to
2. Who was the wisest?
a. the hare
b. moose
c. crow
d. owl
The only thing that I can glean is that there was no owl. And that the moose must be the wisest, for as he very wisely proclaimed, "Pineapples don't have sleeves."
I love it when the hare replies to the pineapple's sudden appearance with a very literate... "Um, hi."
(I thought we weren't supposed to say 'um'... at least, that's what's been ingrained into me. I use it anyway, but I mean, it's a public school. Wouldn't you think that they wouldn't want to undermine any die-hard English teachers? "Um, hi." Gimme a break.)
Makes me glad to be homeschooled... I would not want to tackle this particular test!!
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Are you a fan of delicious flavor?
Haha, is anyone here a fan of Psych? My BFF came over a few weeks ago and we made pineapple upside-down cake in my Easy-Bake Oven. Here's the recipe that actually WORKS.
PINEAPPLE UPSIDE-DOWN CAKE:
1/4 cup yellow cake batter
3 teaspoons pineapple juice
1 slice pineapple; drained, cut in half
brown sugar
Grease Easy-Bake Oven pan lightly.
Cover bottom of Easy-Bake Oven pan with brown sugar. Arrange thin slices of drained pineapples over brown sugar. Mash lightly with spoon.
Pour cake batter over pineapples.
Bake about 20 minutes. Let cool.
Serve cake with pineapple side up.
(recipe taken without permission from eborecipes.com)
And it works! Here's a pic of our cake.
Anyways, Shawn's lightbulb wattage was WAYYY too high. Maybe that's why his cake didn't cook correctly.
Ciao, and pull out your own Easy-Bake Oven to bake with! Ahh, what memories... (Warning: Clean the oven before preheating. You most definately do NOT want your lovely oven to start smoking because you neglected to remove the white cake from sixteen years ago. Yes, they're THAT old.)
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